Sunday, January 3, 2010

Bittersweet Beginnings....

2010. I join the ranks of people making lists for the New Year. Though I don't call mine resolutions. I call them Goals. My lists are always long and hopeful. Last year, I was able to check all but a couple items off of my list. This year, I've already got 2 things checked off with a 3rd task coming to a close quickly.


I hate messes. I can't stand clutter. I don't like having Things. I'm seriously not materialistic at all. My kids, on the other hand, take after their dad on this one. Especially my daughter. She has THINGS. Everywhere. All over. Stuffed here. Hidden there. It drives me batty. She's not even aware of everything she has. I don't get it. At all.

She turns 18 in 4 1/2 months. She's got The Itch and she's got it bad. She's looking forward to stepping through the magical portal into adulthood. Freedom to do what she wants! Space to run in the open wild! Making her own path in life.

With a lot of thought and wrestling within my heart, I decided to let her leave and move to her dad's for the remainder of her Ball & Chain Days. We decided it would be a nice transition before she left for college and was totally on her "own." She left a day earlier than planned which ripped at my heart. I cried. She cried. We held each other and cried.

Both of us felt the shift in our relationship at that moment. It hurt. It felt good. It was full of promise. It was too soon. It was right on time.

I grieved for a week. Seriously grieved. My heart ached and I crawled in my bed during my free moments and nursed my wounds. There comes a time when enough is enough and you need to pull yourself up and get back to life. So I did what I usually do in these situations. I threw myself head first into the 2010 Goals list.

I tackled all the bedrooms (including closets and drawers), the hall closet, games, both safes and both bathrooms. I made a pile for the VA to come and get. I seriously don't know how I will get this stuff out to the curb. I have a pile the same size to throw out.

Last night, I went through all the email accounts and cleaned them out, updated the master password list, and deleted subscriptions & accounts we don't use. I also deleted all my other blogs except for 2. This morning, I had a shredding party which will continue into this afternoon as I go through both filing cabinets.


It's a mantra I repeat in my head as I'm cleaning, deleting, organizing. It feels so good! It feels so freeing! What a great way to start the New Year.

Bittersweet transitions, New Beginnings, and letting go of Things that no longer deserve to take up space in my home or life.

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